Monday, June 16, 2008

Hmm...There are too many things happened recently......

I am too playful, naive, straightforward, too confident and never think about the consequences...These are my weaknesses...And I know I did really hurt many people and many of that have become scars in their heart. Although 'sorry' this word seems doesn't help much and many people have been misusing it, I have to say it millions times to those I hurt. I hope it can ease your pain although it cannot make what has been done be undone...

I am selfish....Most of the times, I do things is because I wanna do and neglect others' feelings...Although sometimes the things I do is for my friends, maybe my stubbornness and the way is wrong, the things will become worse than expected and I do hurt my friends accidentally...

I am not a genius. But there are not many people can understand what's on my mind. I always said 'I don't expect people to understand my mind', but deep in my heart, it is the other way round. I am just an ordinary guy. Sometimes I really need someone to be with me always and lend his/her ears. I am not a saint, therefore I always make mistake. And I always hope people can forgive me, especially my friends. I really don't hope I will lose such wonderful friends because of my foolishness. I will remorse in the rest of my life...

I don't know since when I have hidden my true feelings or shut the door. I don't like people to worry about me. That's why I seldom share my troubles, sadness or my sorrows with others. I always keep them in my heart and solve them by myself. I want people surrounding me can always be happy. That's my hope...

I know my private life is complicated. Someone once said comment on my private life. I am unable to control what people think of me. But I have to make myself clear: I will never be proud of having such complicated life. Sometimes, it's a burden. People always look at the surface, but they always jump into conclusion without knowing the truth behind which is always can't be told. Well, after all, just like the name of Bon Jovi's song, "It's my life". Being myself, my true self is the thing I always do. My life will have to carry on no matter how.

Many times I heard people said 'if the time can reverse, I hope I would have never done all the mistakes I have made", but can the time really reverse? Answer: YES, providing I can surpass the speed of light, which is IMPOSSIBLE...So, the only thing we can do is just looking forward, learn through mistakes and amending what we have done. Learning is a life-long journey and we will only learn the lesson when we make mistakes. Making mistakes is not a sin, but never learn through mistakes is.

"To err is human, to forgive divine."

~ Alexander Pope, 1688-1744~

i will always miss you*
1:15 AM
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